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I have been writing letters to Cilla almost every day. I haven't felt creative at all - some of you seem to blossom your poetry during grief. Well, I was cleaning up the computer and found that I did indeed write something, about a month ago. My Cilla died suddenly on Feb. 16th. I took her and her brother in for a routine exam, and he took Cilla in the back for a blood test, and I never saw her alive again. I guess her breathing got erratic and her heart stopped :( She was only 13. She was my best friend.

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Dear my sweet Cilla, I havenít been able to write any poems since you left. Itís so hard.


All is quiet now
No meows to answer
No one to talk with

The plans we made
Iíve had to let go
If only Iíd been faster

The vacuum goes on
No one runs
Your fur is disappearing

I donít want to lose you
Any part of you
But the fading begins

And it hurts me
Because I promised forever
You are my soul mate

You helped me learn
That I was ok being me
That I could be loved

You taught me
To hold my ground
And stand up for myself

You showed me
The sun feels good
As does a good snuggle

You made it clear
Feelings were appropriate
And they were to be shared

You loved me
When I felt alone
No matter what

And I loved you as well
Bites on the face and
Knocked over bottles

You taught me routine
You made me feel like
I had a place to be

I miss our family
We never thought
It would end so soon.

I love you Cilla,
Always and forever



4-7-06